molecular beam epitaxy

I have to return some videotapes

2011 FiHS F1 World Championship
May 6 - Round 5 : Turkey

With only two hours of sleep after yet another drinking binge (at Carlo Genilo's birthday party), I was totally hungover for this one. A quick shower and a big mug of coffee helped a bit, but I was not able to run some warmup laps during the practice session before the race. I wasn't even able to put in a qualifying lap and started in my customary last place. Somehow I couldn't run the big Turn 8 flat-out like I should have, but I brought it home without a scratch and that's five consecutive rounds with zero incident for me.

J Kim in the Red Bull started in Pole Position and put in a strong drive to finish 4th.

StevenM, subbing for JoshJ in the Red Bull, got tangled up in the first corner with a certain incident prone Lotus and again with MarkG of McLaren. He recovered and finished in 2nd place by managing his tire wear and being patient while slicing through the field.

RacerScott uncharacteristically missed a braking point and narrowly avoided taking out both Ricardo Gonzalez in the Mclaren and J Kim in the Red Bull. There was no epic RS vs RG duel this time and the current champion finished 3rd.

A wild and wacky race for MarkG of Mclaren, accused of ignoring blue flags while being lapped by Dave Carney in the Virgin, and unnecessary blocking while in a fight for position with Tom101 in the Renault. I think he blew out his right front tire after missing his pitstop, and eventually got disqualified in post-race scrutineering for not submitting his tire log file.

Sebastian Scott in the Toro Rosso and Tim202 in the Renault were in a tight battle that lasted several laps, with Tim finally taking the position with a bold maneuver round the outside of a turn. Both drivers finished in the points.

Sean Higgins was running well in the Mercedes until pitstop problems compromised his race and he ended up in 14th.

Dave Carney drove superbly and finished 5th in the Virgin but sparked a brief debate after declaring the Pirelli tires were crap. I already said my piece about the tire wear issue during pre-season testing.

Newcomer Cauchy brought the Force India home in his debut race at FiHS. Good job, man.

"This was a great race for me," said Ricardo Gonzalez who won the 2011 FiHS Turkey GP in dominant fashion. J Kim tried to stay with him during the opening laps but he was clearly the fastest through Turn 8 and was never threatened.

and useless country

Failure to qualify at the Shell V-Power event still lingers in my mind. I guess I am just not elite. Been doing this sim racing thing for almost half my life and I've never been a top driver; always anywhere from 2 to 6 seconds slower per lap compared to a fast guy or an alien. There must be something I don't understand, something I didn't learn, for I've always done this racing thing without supervision or guidance. And nowadays I am just too intoxicated and differently motivated.

Whatever happened to my confidence, my courage? Years of drug abuse and the demise of my band must have had something to do with it. But it was destroyed when I became infatuated with this pretty girl and I wanted so much to ask her out but I was afraid to ruin the memories of her teenage years. I had to be certain that I would have a positive effect in her life before I did anything. So I took a long look in the mirror, and I found nothing of value. It felt like there was this abyss between me and her, and I would have fallen into it and completely lost myself if I didn't sacrifice my self-belief.

No way am I blaming her for my racing troubles. I didn't even meet her really, let alone chat with her or any of that. I never saw her eyes and I hardly saw her face and it's hard to imagine all of it now. I just can't help but think that, if only I could see her again, or sit behind her somewhere for an hour or so like I did many years ago in Theology class... if I knew she was doing alright, maybe then it wouldn't matter so much that I'm just a backmarker and a grid filler. Maybe I'll win (saved by zero).

Maybe you should not read this

For your programming has failed
and you have detached from the prime delusion

So now you can apply other frames of mind
to that same picture of life you paint everyday

Those postulations from science-fiction movies will work;

The Matrix, Dark City, The Thirteenth Floor, Existenz, The Truman Show...

Impose the premise of simulated reality to your present situation
and you will see signs that prove this fabrication is true

And you can also remain in that first flight of fancy given to you

The tiny false persistent belief that you already own

Then consider these zombies that surround you,
trapped and isolated in a single desolate dream

Slaves of indoctrination and obsolete ideas
Now is your chance to be unlike them

SRA Indianapolis 125